Established 2014 "All The News That's The Shit" Number 69

Exclusive - The ACTUAL controversal Sarah Palin Column that got Macky D fired. From The New York Daily News Oct. 4, 2011:

Abbott had Costello. Penn has Teller. Mick - Keith. Johnny - Ed. Bonnie even had Clyde. Then how sad was this country's perceived state of affairs that a man with a record of extensive congressional service and unimaginable bravery and patriotism could agree to choose the Alaskan Annie Oakley as his running mate for the most important office on earth? She wasn't a comedic foil, a mute magician (would've been nice), an iconic rhythm guitarist, a jovial side-kick, or even a legendary criminal. They all compliment their partner by giving them better odds for success than not. But, the Presidency isn't Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show, and John McCain and Sarah "Ya Darn Tootin" Palin were soundly defeated in the 2008 election. Horrible economy; wars; handsome, charismatic black-man: a lot to overcome - I got it. But the pandering attempt to stimulate America's bassist gender-oriented nerve endings didn't work. Thanks and praise to the imaginary God of your choosing - we were safe. Done! We were through with that mind-numbing albeit libido stimulating Pimbo (figure it out). See ya on the Hunting Channel.


Like partisan herpes, she painfully returned to the political scene causing irritation and ooze after checking on her brood in Wasilla. One would think (oh, sweet irony) that it would have sunk into her non-cerebral cortex that state-level governess was her political destiny, and giving speeches-for-pay at various conservative dumb-fests is a good gig for a former beauty queen with a double digit IQ. Speaking of, her child with downs syndrome has exhibited more common sense by not running for office. Cause I believe the Republican Propaganda machine has offered the youngster a position based on a morally bankrupt "Common Man" appeal. They are reductionist, serpentine blow-hards who will do or say anything, no matter how false or vulgar, to obtain their political objectives.

The sad reality is Sarah may have wanted to transition into private life, but was lured back by the Grand-Ol-Party Poopers. So many men in their party are being revealed as closeted homosexuals, campaign finance criminals, and so-far-left lunatics that Sarah actually appears safe. The Republican Party pimps Sarah Palin like a two-dollar-whore out to their Fox News-primed sheep to establish a viable candidate for the 2012 election. And what's exponentially sad is she may actually be the one. I want her to disappear. Thinking people with any sense of political propriety want her to keep on the-low-down in Wasilla. But what are their other options? Chris Christy? Smart, genuine guy. Good record. Too Fat. He's at least a hundred pounds away. Even the Right-Wing-Nuts want a candidate that won't kiss the pavement if he eats a Wopper too high in sodium. Ran Paul? Only if the Neon-Red States secede into their own reactionary republic. What about that flip-flopping, stuffed Mormon suit Mitt Romney? He fulfills certain absurdest, conservative criteria......Yikes - One potential abomination at a time.

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